Vincent Stanley Benfell III

Stan's family and friends are in our prayers.

The first time I met Stan was when I invited him to serve as the associate director over academic programs at the Kennedy Center. Having never met Stan before, my invitation was based on the recommendation of a respected friend. Stan said he would talk to his wife. He came back with a “yes”! Best decision for the Kennedy Center he or I ever made. Stan later replaced me as director and was a wise and kind leader, teacher, and mentor. His influence made a difference in the lives of so many, including my own. My prayers are with Leslie and the Benfell family, as well as with everyone in his Kennedy Center family.

Stan, sei scomparso troppo presto, lasciando un vuoto che le parole non possono colmare. Ci mancheranno la tua mente brillante, il tuo spirito giocoso e il tuo cuore generoso. Insegnando ci hai regalato molto di più delle tue lezioni: ci hai offerto il tuo modo di vedere e di capire il mondo, e te ne siamo grati. E ora, come Dante, anche tu hai assunto il tuo eterno, meritato posto accanto all' "Amor che move il sole e l'altre stelle". Le mie più sincere e sentite condoglianze a tutta la famiglia Benfell.

Dear Leslie and Family, I first met Stan when I came to BYU in 1990, and every memory I have of him in the intervening years is of a smile that never seemed to leave his face, along with wisdom and a balanced sense of fairness in all that he did as a leader. I am truly grateful that I knew and admired him deeply. I cannot adequately express the sorrow I feel at his sudden passing, nor can I describe the sincerity of condolence I send to you.

Stan was someone I came to love over a period of years during which we would find ourselves in conversations and activities with mutual friends and neighbors. I can't say how the bond formed exactly, but I felt its power as my heart broke at this news. I've hiked and ridden with him for years, and during every moment I knew I was in the presence of a truly generous, deeply kind, and always thoughtful man. The White Rim Trail now describes the shape of the chasm I feel at his loss. God speed, dear friend.

Dear Leslie, Debra and I are saddened beyond our capacity to express in words by this untimely, unexpected loss of our friend and colleague. As you know, I met Stan when he was recently returned from his mission and taught him in an accelerated Italian class. I then chose him as my teaching assistant on a Spring Term in Florence. He was incredibly helpful, affable, and admired by all the students. He studied Dante with me and went on to become a highly respected Dantista. Through him I met his brother Steve, who went with us on our Semester in London. How I respected these Benfell men for their intelligence, wit, and unwavering faith! Stan became our colleague in the College of Humanities and was respected by all for his diligence, good humor, and balance. He will be deeply missed by all who knew him. I count it among my greatest BYU memories to have had him first as a student and later as a peer. God bless you and your family during this challenging time. Respectfully, Madison Sowell (BYU professor emeritus of Italian)

I have three incredible months of memories with Professor Benfell and his sweet family, all from our time in London during the Fall of 2014. That study abroad was the most joyous and incomparable few months of my life, and in large part due to the intentional planning of Professor Benfell and others. We, what feels like quite literally, frolicked around the United Kingdom for several weeks being blessed with his knowledge and passion for arts, humanities, literature, and history. There are too many fond memories to recount, and I will forever be blessed to have known him and considered him a friend and mentor. Holding him and those memories in my heart forever. Sending prayers of love and comfort to Leslie and the kids ❤️

I don't know when I first met Stan, but it was almost certainly while he was an undergraduate. Whatever the case, we came to be colleagues, someone I respected and liked to work with. We cooperated on a number of university ventures, he took part in several faculty-wide seminars on philosophy, he was director of a Study Abroad program while I was Academic Director of the BYU London Centre. It was lovely to be in the Center with Stan, Leslie, and their family. I will miss him as a friend and colleague.

I have so many memories to share about Stan and I will put pen to paper soon. But for now, my heart breaks for the Benfell family, the BYU community, and all of Stan's countless friends. He was kind, generous, and fiercely committed to the success (academic and otherwise) of all his students. I will miss him terribly.

Stan taught courses that influenced and shaped my life in real ways. But what I remember most is the way he made time for me to advise on questions well after I left the university when he had no obligation to do so. I was so impressed by his kindness and generosity, and I am deeply saddened to hear of his passing.

Leslie & family,
We are heartbroken for you!
You are in our prayers!
We hope you can feel peace that only Christ can give, as you navigate through this life without your beloved Stan!
May God bless you and give you strength and peace!
We love you!
Robert & Michelle ( Hansen ) Wahlquist & family

https://youtu.be/V-wJbf0y3t4?is=fQ2R3Gw5kr-7bO-A

I love this song.. it has given me a lot of comfort after my mom passed last year.

So grateful to Stan for always being welcoming, kind, and for helping to bring one of my greatest friends into the world. So much love for your family ❤️

I am stunned and saddened to hear of Stan's passing. We met as young graduate students at NYU and have crossed paths a few times over the years since then in our academic roles. I knew him as a bright, kind, and gentle man. He was an exceptional human being, and I am blessed and grateful to have known him. My sincere condolences to Leslie and the rest of the family. My heart is with you.

Stan was a wonderful person and colleague. Working at the Kennedy Center with him were the best years of my career at BYU.

My heartfelt condolences to Stan's family and friends. Stan was to some degree a coworker and to great degree a friend. I especially appreciate how perceptive and kind he was! I wanted to share two memories that stick out to me:

I graduated on an off-cycle and Stan and Cory graciously agreed to host a brief graduation ceremony for me in the back office. I wish there was a way to share photos! Stan wore his robes and everything to confer me my diploma cover. :) It made me feel so special, and I was grateful to be able to commemorate the end of my degree program before I moved out east!

I also meet often with Kennedy Center crew when they visit D.C., and there was one time that their visit fell on a day that I had a particularly bad experience at work. After their panel event was over, Stan talked with me for probably an hour and listened to me complain it out. I am still so grateful for his listening ear; it was a day I really needed it.

Stan was my professor, my mentor, and my friend. He let me walk with him to class while asking him questions regarding anything from Orlando Furioso to Dante, from Manhattan to Provo, and from pop culture to family life. He was simply a joy for conversation! His Yoda impression was quite excellent, too, both voice and syntax. Stan was an outstanding person. Leslie, I am truly sorry for your and your children’s loss.

What a total shock to learn of Stan's passing. We were hired at BYU in the same year and spent many hours together in the early years in faculty orientations and seminars, but also later talking about great books, literary theory, and, European Studies—a program in which we both taught and held leadership roles. Looking back, what I remember first is that Stan was an all-around good man, a truly good man: kind, generous, supportive, a thoughtful scholar and leader, always ready to pitch in, always a bit self-deprecating and ready for a good laugh to keep things in perspective. I will miss Stan and our many good years together as friends and colleagues. My deepest sympathies and condolences to the Benfell family.

I was one of the many lucky students who were blessed to be led by Professor Benfell and his family on a study abroad at the London Centre (Fall 2014). It was an experience that genuinely changed my life, in no small part because the Benfells were there making it so fun, joyful, and wonderful. I'm so grateful for Professor Benfell, Leslie, Matt & Frances, that I got to cross paths with them in this life and be a recipient of their generosity and joy in travel & learning. What a loss, sending so much love.

Stan was one of the brightest, warmest, kindest, most uplifting folks at BYU. He made all the difference in my time in and around the Kennedy Center. He was so encouraging and genuinely invested in the lives of his students. A downright good person and a real treasure.

I knew Stan as Dr. Benfell, having taken his civilization 1 and 2 classes in 2007/2008. Normally I always just signed up for classes based on what was most convenient for my schedule, but I loved Dr. Benfell's civ 1 class so much I intentionally sought him out for civ 2. He was so kind and compassionate; he invited me to consider doing a study abroad, and while I didn't end up going, it was deeply impactful that he thought about me enough to invite me individually. I'm glad to say I was able to know him even briefly, as it seems that all who interacted with him were blessed by his goodness.

So sorry ro hear about Stan. I knew him from Short Hills ward, New Jersey. He was younger than me by a couple years. I remember he was loved by his sisters.... even as a teenager! Just an all-around good guy from the beginning.

Although I did not know Stan personally, I have since been blessed by learning how deeply he touched so many of my colleagues and friends at BYU. Through talking to them, I have felt of his goodness and kindness. I truly wish I had known him. My sincerest condolences and prayers to the Benfell family and all who know and love him.

We are devastated to hear that Stan died earlier this week, tragically taken so young doing something he loved so much. When our daughter Laura called with the news we shed tears for him and his family, and quickly started reminiscing on all the wonderful memories we shared years ago in New Jersey.
We were already members of the Short Hills Ward when the Benfells arrived, moving from Hawaii. They bought a house close by ours, and our children quickly became friends. The youngest, Jane, became close friends with our daughter Laura, and I taught Becky, Kathy, and Jane piano for many years, as well as sharing Stake Girls’ Camp with them as camp director. Becky and Kathy taught everyone the Hula! I watched them grow and develop into remarkable, caring young women.
Their parents, Kay and Stan, became valued friends, as we worked together in ward and stake organizations, and both parents became highly respected and loved by all who knew them. Stan Sr. was a great bishop and stake president, and had a beautiful singing voice. I directed many concerts, programs, and plays during my twenty- five years in New Jersey, and Kay and Stan were always willing to share their talents and participate, whether singing, or in readers’ theatre. They were great lovers of the Arts. This legacy was passed down to all their children, and Stan Jr. obviously inherited his fathers voice!
When Summer came each year Kay and I drove our kids down to Sandy Hook once a week to go to the beach. It was such a joyful time, seeing our kids carrying all the paraphernalia from the car to the sands- towels, blankets, chairs, toys, coolers, food, umbrellas and everything else you can imagine. It was quite a trek! Stan and Steve were older than our son John, but always took the time to play with him and include him in all their activities. Some weeks we took them all to a cinema in Scotch Plains that had a Disney summer program. Popcorn and a drink were included in the price of a ticket, and this became a fun activity for all of us. Our families shared so many great times like these, and the Benfell family became dear friends.
After some years the Benfells moved away, but we always remembered the loving friendship we had shared. The last time I saw Kay and Stan together was at Bud Nickerson’s funeral in Provo. We shared memories and talked about our children. Stan was so proud of all his children, and especially mentioned that Jane had taught herself to play the organ and was now ward organist! He died just a few years later. Sadly it was during Covid so holding a memorial
was problematic. Our whole family regretted that, as we certainly would have driven up from Arizona.
And now we are sadly told that his beloved son Stan has been tragically taken from his family. Except for Jane, I had not kept up with the Benfell children over the past forty years, but I knew that they were all exemplary in continuing the example and legacy of their parents.
In reading the many tributes to Stan I am in awe of all he had accomplished, and the many people whose lives he touched. That is the true tribute to a life well lived. What a remarkable life he led, and how proud his wife and children must be. Our hearts go out to them at this terribly sad time. Our thoughts and prayers will be with you in the coming days and years. We wish we could be with you for his memorial service tomorrow. If there had been more time we would certainly have driven up from Arizona. We know there will be many friends there to express their love for your family.
Jesus told us, “blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” That is a blessing, for grief is real and a part of life.
To Kay, Becky, Kathy Jane and Steve- please know that you are loved and our prayers are with you. To Leslie and your children, we send our sincere condolences and prayers for peace. Remember that Stan will always be with you, in your hearts and souls, and forever in your memories. He is now in the loving arms of Jesus and will watch over you and your children as a loving Guardian Angel. God bless you and give you peace.
Love and sympathies from all of us- from Laura and John and their families, and from CJ and me. Blessings.
Gill

Stanley went out of his way to give me advice about studying in America when I was a teenager. His kindness was felt and his genuine spirit was powerful. I really adored his family when they spent time here in London. Condolences to the entire family.

I was a student of Professor Benfell's. I majored in Comparative Literature in 2017. Professor Benfell taught four of my classes.

I have a gifted cousin who told me the only 'B+' he ever got at BYU was in Professor Benfell's Comp Lit 201 course. Professor Benfell did not espouse what is sometimes called "the soft bigotry of low expectations." In some courses, we wrote weekly response papers to what we were reading; he would give me 8/10 on them. I had to go into office hours and learn to be a better writer to earn 'A's in his classes. He was kind, reasonable, and generous.

I was also impressed by his humility. He once shared that when he was a student at NYU, a Professor said something like, "If only all those Mormon kids were intelligent like you!" Professor Benfell said his reaction was to say, "You just need to meet more Mormons." That story has stayed with me because of the generosity of spirit it shows; it would have been tempting to let the compliment go to his head.

Thank you Professor Benfell for the impact you made on my life. God bless you and your family.

Sadly, I don’t have any memories or even I didn’t know Stan. I am Bestie to Becky his sister. I know how much she loves her family and she talked about her siblings quite often. And Stan was with that conversation those conversations. When she told me, it was very sad even for me who didn’t know him but I know Becky and I know how much she loves her family so I know this hurt her so badly to lose such a wonderful brother pray for his family and for my Becky.

I am so grateful for Stan’s time as Bishop - his kindness, care, and understanding, and especially humor.

The first professor I loved was Stan Benfell. In the Fall of 2002 I arrived at BYU in the fall of 2002 as an idealistic freshman eager to explore all the biggest questions of life. I enrolled in Professor Benfell’s Comparative Literature 201 class and it was everything I dreamed university life could be. We read the Iliad, Oedipus Rex, the Aeneid, Beowulf, and more, ending with Professor Benfell’s beloved Divine Comedy. As a teacher he was brilliant, funny, and passionate and always carried himself with great dignity and humility. Each week he would select 2-3 student essays as examples of excellence. The day he chose mine filled me with joy. Through his class my intellect sharpened, my imagination expanded, and my soul deepened. Because of him I decided to become a humanities major and over four beautiful years was shaped and nourished by many of Stan’s colleagues and mentees: Matt Ancell, George Handley, Michael Call, Carl Sederholm, and Kerry Soper.

Over the years, I stayed in touch with Stan and would always try to see him when I visited Provo. He became not just a mentor, but a friend I could joke and commiserate with over chips and salsa. When we launched Wayfare, he was one of our biggest supporters and wrote a beautiful essay for our 3rd issue entitled “Anxiously Engaged.” Here’s a passage from the final paragraph:

“I have thought a lot about the verse in Ether 12:27, where the Lord tells Moroni that he will make our weakness become strong if we exercise faith. The Lord has indeed at times made my weakness of anxiety strong, but that has not meant—even in those moments—that I am no longer anxious. As the Spirit told me on that fall day in the Kyoto Peace Garden in Holland Park, I am not going to be relieved of this “thorn in the flesh.” But it can become strong, I have realized, when I refuse to use my anxiety as an excuse and instead exercise some faith that the Lord can use my anxiety in productive ways. I have learned that the Lord is intimately aware of my struggles, even if he does not relieve me of them, just as he is aware of my hopes and triumphs. And this is a lesson that we should all learn. The Lord in fact needs me as his disciple—precisely because of my anxiety or other weaknesses as well as my strengths—just as he needs all of us.” 

In many ways, my entire life and career since has been inspired by what I learned and experienced from Stan and the BYU humanities department. Stan lit a flame in my heart that still burns. I look forward to reuniting with him and reading and discussing art and literature in the eternities.

In my time at BYU, I took more classes from Professor Benfell than anyone else. His courses in Comparative Literature ignited my intellectual curiosity. He was engaging, passionate, curious and encouraging. He had a significant impact on my young mind that I have carried into the rest of my life. I was deeply honored when he attended my wedding reception--a kindness that was consistent with his thoughtful commitment to his students. I have just re-read some of our email exchanges after I had graduated and moved on, and I'm struck by his kindness in taking the time to respond to what was surely one of many correspondences from past students.

I served in the Paris, France, Mission with Stan. It was hard to call him Elder Benfell. I preferred to call him, Vincent Stanley.Benfell III as it just seemed to roll off the tongue. I would tease him that with a name like that he was destined for greatness. Little did I know how prophetic that little jab was.
I have not had much contact with him over the last 40 years except for briefly at a Mission reunion or two, but I remember his humble, sweet, and pleasant nature and his patience with those of us who were far less intelligent and refined. My condolences are extended to his family at this difficult time. I loved him from the day. I met him and that love never left even though we had very few chances to be together since 1983.

Stan’s loving and welcoming actions towards me during the formative years of my life had a profound impact on me. I felt and witnessed his genuine love and care for his neighbors and family, and this example has resonated through my life. I mourn his loss, but seek hope in the same Redeemer who Stan diligently emulated and served.

So incredibly sad to learn of Stan's passing. I'm grateful that he was my uncle and for the good man he was. My family's hearts and thoughts go out to Leslie, Grace, Matthew, and Francis.

I worked with Stan in the Kennedy Center when I was the Africana Studies Coordinator. He was always a delight to work with, witty, supportive, and wise, handling difficult situations calmly and with understanding. I also felt he considered me his friend. I was inspired by the relationship he and Leslie had and have very fond memories of dinners with the both of them and the ride they gave me to the train station after one. They made the most of moments with people. My heart goes out to Stan's family.

I told the leadership of the African Cultures and Languages student association that he was a great advocate for this new student association and of Africana Studies. He touched so many lives directly and indirectly.

My sincere condolences to his family. As well as his extended family! It's been many years since I had seen Stan.
I am Kay's cousin.
Glorie

The service today was lovely. The song that Matt & Grace performed and the lovely tributes by Frances, Matt, & Grace were so heartfelt. The program was beautiful (Hailey & others?). So many people in attendance. Leslie comforting all of us! Such a great tribute to Stan, a man I wish I had known better. Love, Aunt Susie

Stan was a good friend, a good leader, and a good friend. He and I worked together in the realm of international programs at BYU, where I am a professor in the business school. His administrative talent was on full display as director of the Kennedy Center. Before that, as years went by, he let me come into his classes and talk about my business study abroad programs I was directing. That was very helpful and accommodating, especially given that business and literature are such different fields (although I was an English major turned MBA, so in my own life they fit together, as they could for other students, he recognized and appreciated that). He was director of the BYU London Centre, where I was a student years before as an undergrad, which experience was transformational in my life. He was always so kind and generous with his time and efforts to help the international cause, in whatever form it took, at BYU. He was a delight to work with. The world’s light, at least for time being, will be a little dimmer without him. “May flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.”

Very very sad to hear of Stan's passing. My condolences to Leslie and all his family. I met Stan in 2004, when with about a dozen others we shared lodgings at Darwin College in Cambridge for our NEH seminar on the Seven Deadly Sins. After getting our room assignments on the Sunday before the seminar began, we walked around Cambridge and had lunch together. (If he was anxious, it didn't show!) Since then we only met in person occasionally, here in South Bend or Chicago and even once in Moab when he and Leslie drove down to meet me and my spouse. But our email exchanges and phone calls were always a treat. He was a caring and tuned-in friend, as he was to countless others. I am in awe of his work on Dante, and he was always helpful to me on this score. His scholarly work was deep and sharply focused, but he wore his knowledge lightly. Boy am I going to miss him.

I had the absolute gift of working as a receptionist in Stan’s Kennedy Center office for a year before my mission. Throughout that year, I learned so much from him and his experiences. He would always stop and ask about my day despite having a very busy schedule of his own. He listened and was intentional about thanking me for my work. I am so grateful for his friendship, and I always looked forward to seeing him around the Kennedy Center when I came back to visit after my mission. His testimony of Christ was displayed in his gentle example, and it has impacted me for good.

My sincerest condolences on the all-too-sudden loss of this fine man. It is difficult to process how someone so vibrant could be taken so soon, for he did much good. The Kennedy Center was lucky to have him at the helm for the years he was there. May he rest in peace.

Benfell family! I just saw the news about Stan's passing on Facebook tonight and gasped. I have so much love for your family from the time I spent with you at the London Center, and the influence that experience has had on my life has been immeasurable. Just last month I took my two older girls to see their first Shakespeare play and told them so many stories about my classes and experiences and going to the Globe and standing where I could lean against the stage and try not to get kicked in the face. I just loved studying Shakespeare in Dr. Benfell's class and working with him as a TA on that second trip. He was so kind and interesting and wise and I just love your whole family so much. I'm so very sorry.

Our hearts were broken as we learned of the passing of Stan. But we send our hearts to Leslie and your family at this time. Our lives have been blessed by knowing both of you, and pray that you feel the love of the Savior, your family, and the many many people whose lives Have been enriched by Stan’s counsel and generosity over the years.

Stanley was a magnificent scholar from whom I learned so much. He will be greatly missed.